“the harshest truth is easier to deal with than the softest falsehood”

Exercising gratitude leads to the realization that what we have is not related to what we do – which leads us to be more accepting of having nothing, less judgmental of others, and a realigning of what it takes in this life to be happy.

I recently came to understand, in some small way, the beauty of most of the natural world around us as a gift. A sunset, a mountain, a color, a smell, a texture, etc. – these are free to all and in most cases freely available and not completely constrained by others. And if this is the common denominator – everything else is a bonus and deserves our especial thanks in addition to that common denominator.

I worry about how to overcome the problem of the “Lost Generation,” at least that’s how I refer to them.

Who are they? I guess the easiest way is to use social security as an example. This is very simplistic (and I know there are more factors and variables than mentioned here, but this will give you an idea about what I am referring to.)

• People have been paying into social security with the promise of it being returned in the form of monetary support;
• It can’t do this indefinitely based on the current system;
• People need to divert payments from social security to some other vehicle for “future support”;
• Once payments are no longer made into social security, there is a group of people that made good faith payments to the old system, but will receive no benefit. This group spans the time until those who ‘invested’ into the new vehicle are able to receive benefit.

I call this group the “Lost Generation.”  Without some form of Stop Gap, Phase In, Phase Out, Opt In, Opt Out, or something else – these folks would be in trouble.

This concept can be applied to many situations, not just social security. In fact, I first came upon the concept when discussing the Juvenile Justice system, what is wrong with it, and how do we make it better. My class had some great insights and ideas, some of which were revolutionary.

In our brainstorming we came upon the ‘novel’ idea of not having any single parent births, to the end of not having any more single parent households (remember, we’re brainstorming) – a factor that would greatly affect juvenile problems. However, even if this started happening tomorrow, we still have 18 years of kids caught in the old system. A Lost Generation. What about them?

The problem becomes implementation – many, if not most, revolutionary ideas are completely different than the currently implemented plan. Any radical change will (may) see opposition from various factions that benefit from the status quo, or even just ‘fairness’ advocates – it’s not fair that the new plan is better, because I’m (they’re) caught in the old plan, why can’t I (they) participate in the new plan, too.

Let me use a current example of this (I apologize for the Mormon vernacular and concepts, I hope it will be clear enough anyway):

My son started high school this year. Because he is musically talented, he was asked as a Freshman to play in the school’s Jazz Band in addition to the regular band class. This means that he is taking two music classes, filling his elective slots.

A few years back, the local Church Education System (CES) Coordinator/Representative/Whoever was able to finagle a ‘released time’ program from the school district. (For those unfamiliar with this, it means the school district agrees to ‘release’ the students during the school day, who want to take seminary, to the CES program, which holds the class in a building off of the school campus. The school then uses the grade given in the CES program on the student’s transcript and counts it as an elective.) This is apparently, quite a feather in someone’s cap when accomplished outside of the Utah, Idaho, Arizona corridor.

Well, my son is using both of his elective slots for music, and is therefore unable to take seminary in the ‘released time’ program. My son wants to keep his BYU options open (that’s a different discussion, but both Mom and Dad and Sister have gone there), but is told that he has to ‘graduate’ from the Seminary Program (or attend four full years).

I thought there wouldn’t be a problem, we’ll just start an early morning class, and I’ll volunteer to teach it (I’ve done it in the past and quite enjoy it), he’ll be able to get four full years, problem solved. Or, if that doesn’t work, we can use CES’s Home Study Program to fulfill the requirements.

To my surprise, neither of these options will work with the current people in charge who make the decisions – “If we allow that, then too many kids will take advantage of that option and we’ll lose the Released Time program.” So my son is not doing a ‘sanctioned’ Seminary this semester.

Finally, the issue: If I am able to get this policy changed, my son will not be able to take advantage of it. He is already behind a semester and therefore cannot complete 4 full years. Next years students will have the benefit of all of the options. But my son is trapped between those who bought into the old system – who chose seminary instead of that ‘second band class’, and who would claim that it wouldn’t be fair to let my son’s unsanctioned ‘home study’ count toward his requirement of four full years. My son is a member of the ‘Lost Generation’.

So how do you make a radical change in today’s society, while overcoming the challenge of the Lost Generation? I don’t think it is impossible.

I wonder about Nineveh (see Jonah 3:5-8). . .

“It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are.”
~ E. E. Cummings

The End of Petrotyranny

via The Futurist: The End of Petrotyranny.

Why every mom needs a purpose beyond motherhood | Mormon Times.

I didn’t want to start a firestorm of angry mommy comments directed at
me so I am just sending this little rant to you (TheGlider and any other person who happens to stumble in here).

I am actually offended by the article.  It feels like just one more snide dig aimed at those of us who don’t feel that motherhood is a drudgery of self sacrifice.  It demeans me personally because “all” I want to do is focus on my family/children right now.  It goes by so fast.  Then, after this time there will be another time when there is a slice for me.

It upsets me when articles or books written by women presume to know how I feel and then assume that all feel the same way.  Phrases like, “all women need”, or “we all should”, or “it’s only natural that”, shout out to me that if you don’t feel the same way I do you are somehow wrong and need to re-examine your life.  Maybe it’s because we have chosen to homeschool, or maybe it’s because I seriously just don’t mind that from way early until way late everyday I am just busy and filled with home and family.  Is that bad?  Is it wrong?  Shouldn’t that be for me to decide?  I find articles like this just as demeaning as somebody, anybody, telling me that I have to be one certain way to be a good mom.

I don’t share this woman’s perspective.  That needs to be ok, too.  She shouldn’t be telling me what I need in my life to feel fulfilled even as I don’t go around telling people that if they find fulfillment outside
of their mothering they are bad or wrong.  I feel strongly about this, but, alas, I also feel that if I were to post these feelings I would be cut down and cut short because of them.  I don’t feel the need to justify myself publicly for the choices I have made – perhaps this lady should ask herself why she needs every other woman on board with her for her to feel ok with her choice.

It may surprise many to know that I am a writer.  I am an accomplished and articulate writer.  Short stories, poems, essays, letters . . . my work is not published.  It may never be published.  I am a writer because even though (with the exception of my husband) I receive no validation whatsoever – words entertain, amuse and define my days.  But, I don’t need to carve out a slice for myself everyday to feel like a real woman or a real writer.

I don’t feel degraded when I give all to my kids.  This level of self sacrifice is not going to last forever. Then, I have plans for what I want to do next.  The fact that my perspective allows for that sort of patience is also ok in the paradigm of womanhood and motherhood.

This article just felt like a criticism of what I personally hold dear and it annoys me because, unless provoked, I don’t smear my campaign of motherhood all over anyone else and I guess it would be nice to receive the same courtesy in return from time to time.

The introduction to one of her books.  I just read it again, for the umpteenth time, and it always is incredibly moving to me (and, yes, the reference is deliberate):

When my body was smaller (I was never young,) there was this big beautiful crane that used to come every year and land on the roof of the house across from ours.  I say that it was beautiful, not because it had any physical characteristics that would recommend its appearance, but because it was there every single year.  It would always come very early in the spring and always land on the same roof.  It would land there for three consecutive days, each year, and it would stay landed for most of the day before flying away.

When it left, for good until the next year, I had no doubt that it was being called away by some other pocket of outlandish movement that required its calming influence.  It had a mission of stillness to perform.

I loved that bird.  I loved that it came each year.  I loved that I was a dot on some instinct transmitted map that was manifested only in stillness.

Migration took on a whole new meaning for me when I looked at that bird.  The process of migration became a string of still moments, strung together by a shimmering strand of clear purposeful movement.  That sort of movement I had never known until then.  The movement itself seemed so insignificant, so merely functional, as stringing the moments of stillness together.  The stillness dictated the movement.  Stillness guided every movement, stillness was the departure and the arrival.

I wondered fervently what it thought about while perched up there on “the crazy old guy of our street’s” house.  I could see it perfectly from our kitchen window, in the morning before I left for school.  Usually the window was steamy from breakfast preparations, and this gave the bird a shimmery silver, enchanted appearance standing rigid against the glowing morning sky.  And, it was still standing there when I trudged home from school.  It was the only testament I had that stillness remained the goal, and that it was attainable.

The memory of that bird has made me realize that there is no difference between running to stand still, and just running.  None of my migrations have ever lead me to the Stillness of the Crane.

By Mrs. Marcus and her Little Hen

Oh beautiful chickens
Oh fowl most high
We are ever so grateful
Away you don’t fly.

Oh clever wondrous birds
You need no fellow
To lay your treasure
With yolks most yellow.

Sweet feathered ladies
Your shape makes us happy
Your cluck lets us know
Your attitude is snappy!

Wondrous creatures of rhythm
Your movements hypnotic
Your dig and your scratch
Are hardly spasmodic.

Oh glorious hens
You nest and you roost
Just the sight of you
Gives my mood a boost

Treasured backyard girls of the coop
What more can I say?
Feeding and watering and gathering you in
Is a joy for me each day.

Was reading again tonight and came across this, again.  Everytime I read this the simplicity bowls me over.  The Answer, His Answer, is beautifully unencumbered:

“But to me, there’s not one ailment the world can own that wouldn’t be cured by the first great commandments that Jesus offered us.  I realize it’s simplistic.  I realize that although it’s simple it is the hardest requirement ever. But wouldn’t it be nice if someone acknowledged this, out loud, without all the politically correct garbage stinking up the conversation?  The world wouldn’t be such a gruesome place if there were more people grounded in this template that God showed us all at the very very beginning and that He continues to uphold.”

I just finished reading Invisible Kingdom: From the Tips of Our Fingers to the Tops of Our Trash, Inside the Curious World of Microbes, by Idah Ben-Barak. Basic Books, 2009.  Wonderful read.  Here was the comment I left:

Who are the creationists you deal with? Are they really the arrogant, narrow minded dogmatic and phobic individuals you include in several footnotes? My definition of creationism must be different . . . using words like “suddenly” and “suddenly endowed” and “special ability” is where creationism and evolution meet, make friends and journey into the sunset to enjoy a long (probably eternal) and fruitful relationship, my friend!! (I am quoting from the last bonus track in The Invisible Kingdom.) I really, really enjoyed the book but was sad to know that because I believe in a Higher Being bringing forth life I “should” have been avoiding your book like the plague . . . truly a sad conclusion! I find it interesting that you can jump from A to, let’s say, M and feel comfortable, that you can “rewind” the tape genetically and figure out the what and when, but for me to inject a simple why into the equation – I seem to be immediately labeled a kinked protein. Hmmmmm . . . . is it just in their natures for scientists to be arrogant, narrow minded and dogmatic and phobic? My sensitivities aside, great read!! Great book! Totally engaging! Made me (and as a consequence of my constantly shouting out to my kids and husband, “Listen to this! You are not going to believe this it is so cool!”) and my whole family re-think what it means to be “at the top of the food chain!”